RED January day 8

I was really fortunate today. I didn’t need to start work until 11am, so I had plenty of time for a run before work.

I followed my usual 3 mile route. My usual run is slightly hilly and, for the most part, follows country lanes. It begins with a bit of a hill, with a nice long downhill slope on the other side. Then it’s a steady uphill pull all the way to the top of the village, for about a mile and a half. Finally, there’s a lovely, welcome downhill run.

It was a bitterly cold morning, with a biting cold wind. As I started running, with the cold wind against my face, I was filled with the usual doubt and negativity – why am I doing this? I can’t do it – I’m never going to get better – etc etc etc.

I find the first couple of minutes are the worst. My legs don’t want to move, and they say to me ‘what? This again? Why are we doing this again? There isn’t a lion chasing us, so why not just walk?’ I ignore my legs. After a few minutes, I find it gets easier. After twenty minutes, I start to feel quite good about running. But by thirty minutes, or just over, I’m done. I slow down, and take a warm down walk.

On the whole, I enjoyed my run today. By the end of the walk, my negativity had gone, and I felt good. Strava tells me I shaved a few seconds off my time. But I want to do more. I want to be able to do more.

I’m not sure whether I stop because I really can’t run for longer – or whether I’m afraid to go on, to push myself. Being overweight, and new to running, I am worried about injury. But I need to be able to keep going for longer. In just over two months, I went from not being able to run for sixty seconds, to being able to run for thirty minutes. I need to keep building on what I’ve achieved so far.

I can do this.

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